A lifetime

On Monday, at 04:30 the phone rang. My heart twists horribly whenever the phone rings so early in the morning. And I wish people are calling just for a chat as they forgot about the time difference. It was Bobby's dad phone and I thought of many possibilities. All not good. Its crazy how much one can imagine the many thoughts and scenarios that pass through your head half asleep. I am amazed at the capacity of the brain. Bobby's grandmother passed away in her sleep in the early hours. She was 90 years old.

The first time I met her was at my wedding in 2005.Then she was able to walk and go everywhere. She joked so much and scolded people at the same time. She spoke to me like she knew like her other grand kids.

Every year we visited her and she did need a reminder of who I was and then she was like her usual. She jokingly complained about her daughter in law, and her daughter in law complained about her. And they would both laugh. There was a lot of laughter when she was in the conversation.

The last time we visited her was July 2012. Her memory had faded. But she still spoke. She was restricted to her room and the living room and she needed help with bathing and doing everything else.
We were happy that our kids could see her and know her. She was their great grand mother.

Over the last year she would have episodes of high blood pressure and temporary memory loss. Caring for her full time was hard on Bobby's uncle and aunt. And they always had to have someone near her at all times. She would stay with my parents in law, when they had to go somewhere on longer periods.

It's  easy to say that she wasnt sick and was lucky that she died in her sleep. But I am sure her children and grand children feel the loss.
 

July 2012 visit

December 2005 Our wedding

July 2012 visit

She

She walked into the classroom, with her long braids and glasses and a white coat on top of a yellow salwar.She had my same last name and her first name started with the same letter as my first name. We were together constantly for the next 4 years, to church , to internship out postings. Sitting at the front steps of the Admin building waiting for her mum to come out after meetings.Waving goodbye as her father picked them up to go home. I was already missing her as I walked back alone to the hostel. I cried at her wedding sad that she was going so far away, that she was someone else's and not mine anymore, but also, because  I wasn't married yet.

She sat across me in church and immediately covered me under her mama hen feathers. We watched bold and the beautiful and Oprah, licking at  a clay pot of spicy fish curry. Her husband slept on the couch as she let me sleep in their one bedroom home on their comfy bed with the air conditioner when I was so sick. She stayed awake most of the time. I cried at my wedding , as she helped me with my saree and makeup, thinking when I would see her again, since I was moving so far away, but also because I was afraid of the change.

She sat opposite me at a friends wedding wearing a black Chinese  dress. She gave me a tiny blue CD with her mix of Worship songs,not so long after. We loved window shopping.... not for clothes but for stationary. Cute notebooks. Cute pens. We enjoyed a  glass of wine most  Fridays when she came for the weekend from another city where she worked. I cried at her wedding, sad that she was going so far away, that she was someone else's  and not mine anymore, but also because I swore I wouldn't make friends again.

She walked into church with her tribe and I knew that thing that  stirred within was good as well as painful.I stayed away but couldn't for long. 2 years later, a month ago I said good bye. I stop by the  covered drum set at church  every week and say hi.

She was in a brides gown , as she welcomed me to this new country. I just arrived from Kuwait that morning.

She sat with her new born as I visited her for the first time, tagging along with my husband.

She sat at the piano in the dark corner in church.

All these women and more have  added to my life. Have played out their purpose in my life. Some continue to, for which I am thankful.

Blueberry picking

A wonderful Saturday, with a typical Dutch weather, where it plays the guessing game of drizzles and light showers. We decided that today was the day to go blueberry picking. Never done it before but was so looking forward to doing it. Especially after reading about it in Shauna Niequist's "Bread and Wine". She, as a child would pick blueberries during the holidays and her mum would freeze it using it throughout the year making blueberry crumble every Sunday.(Don't hold me on the exact details... The book is with another friend... so I can't check for confirmation).

And of course I had to make sure there was a crowd to do the picking. With 4 families and kids each having their own bucket. We and them, raced through rows of blueberry shrubs in the beginning, eager to gather the most and the best.

The kids later decided to pool all their pickings into one bucket and pick together. The women slowed down and went through every shrub picking those that felt right. We were quiet and there were less conversations. Blueberry picking can be quite the focus creator. Fixing our attention to the picking and focusing on a conversation to the self or God.

There were drizzles of rains coming and going. I continued to pick as others left to weigh their buckets and prepare to leave.The distant chatter of kids and the silence surrounding me nestled among these shrubs that were my height. Making it quite easy to spot and pick them. Sliding through branches to reach bunches that were hidden from the previous mad rush of people, turned me into an expert at blueberry picking.

I have been hearing from a few people over the weeks" The harvest is plenty ,but the workers are few".
It echoed in my head as I carried on.

Blueberry Crumb Cake

(Taken from www.marthastewart.com)

Tossing the blueberries with a bit of flour keeps them from sinking during baking. When making streusel, squeeze the mixture into large crumbs so it forms a crisp topping as it bakes instead of melting into the batter.

INGREDIENTS

FOR THE STREUSEL TOPPING

• 1 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/2 cup packed light-brown sugar
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 cup (1 stick) cold unsalted butter

FOR THE CAKE

• 4 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened, plus more for pan
• 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (spooned and leveled), plus more for pan
• 1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon allspice
• 3/4 cup granulated sugar
• 1 large egg
• 2/3 cup low-fat buttermilk, well shaken
• 1 1/2 cups blueberries
• Confectioners' sugar, for dusting

DIRECTIONS

1. STEP 1

   Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Make streusel topping: In a medium bowl, stir together flour, brown sugar, and salt. Cut in the butter using your hands or a pastry blender until large, moist crumbs form. Chill.

2. STEP 2

   Butter and flour a 9-inch square baking pan. In a medium bowl, whisk together 1 1/2 cups flour, baking powder, baking soda, salt, and allspice. In a large bowl, beat the butter and granulated sugar with an electric mixer until fluffy. Add egg; beat well. Add flour mixture and buttermilk alternately until just combined. (Batter will be very stiff.) In a large bowl, toss the blueberries with remaining teaspoon flour. Fold blueberries into the batter; spoon into prepared pan.

3. STEP 3

   Sprinkle cake with streusel topping. Bake until golden brown and a tester comes out clean, 45 to 50 minutes. Let cool completely. Dust with confectioners' sugar before cutting into squares.

A summer day

Yesterday the movers came to pack away Dan and Tracey's house. While they packed we sat in their neighbours garden and the kids played in their pool. Having the kids completely away from all the moving, was a great blessing. Especially the pool. The kids played in the pool from the 10:30  until 16:00. Non stop. The youngest Katie and Elijah would take a break from all the canon balls, diving, and whirlpool, the older boys did , and lie on their towel and chill out. They even had their own picnic with water and apples.Healthy kids!

What a great way to spend the summer! 

Except saying good bye to Team Davis.

At the table

What began  as a simple coffee and cake evening for friends to celebrate Bobby's birthday , turned into a take away Chinese dinner at the table.

Our first gathering in the new house was special in itself. We just got a new massive table on Saturday. Bobby got the time to assemble the legs only after Sunday lunch. So we had our final lunch on our old table .The first meal ever to be had on the new table was with close friends. a full table with 8 adults and 1 toddler. And lots of food. Our old table outside in the garden stretched to its maximum with 9 kids. And a teenager eating on the couch with his i Pod. 

That was a precious moment ! They gave their blessings and poured out love and friendship at the table.

I pray we will have many more precious moments at the table.


I love the familiarity of the same faces around the table- the inside jokes and the shared histories that have been built, brick by brick, story by story, for years. - Shauna Niequist, Bread and Wine

Carrot cake with cream cheese frosting, Lemon curd ice cream with blueberry compote, brownies(far at the back)

Boys playing in the balcony... Don't know how safe that was.. but all are fine

Kids posing

Us.. the group minus two families who were away on holiday

Kids saying grace initiated on their own... precious

Busy at the table

The guys.. Daniel and Mark we missed you guys.

The best part

Caleb with his ice cream. Enjoying every moment

Kai trying out the Lemon Curd Ice cream with blueberries

Pamela saving the bee and boosting it's energy with sugar water, while I wanted to smash it

A house

It's been 3 weeks since we moved to our new home. Very much still drowning in boxes, I cant seem to reduce the number. I havent entered the attic since the first day and the sight of the all the boxes make me nervous. Normal routines must go on too, I realize. My goal is to completely unpack before we leave for New Wine Summer conference. That's 2.5 weeks away. I still need to get a few more shelves , so I can unpack some boxes. I must remember to put the J in joy in all this unpacking and making the house a home.


The past few days , I had friends come over to visit and joined in for lunch. In a messy house with boxes and things in the wrong place, I could still serve a decent lunch, make coffee and tea and bake .

Reading Shauna Niequists "Bread and Wine", I see where I am beyond the boxes. My friends have the freedom to come anytime unannounced. I love that. I love it that they aren't bothered by the boxes that are still there , when they last visited. I love it how we have moved from meeting at restaurants to meeting at each others homes. Food is our common language.



My mums and tots group know where I keep the spoons and cups, the ziploc and tea bags. Some mornings when I am still upstairs in pyjamas ,tooth brush in one hand and a toddler in the other, my group walks in and sets the table with fresh coffee and  pot of tea in the middle first and then as I finish up and come down the table is complete with baked goodies and fruits, cucumbers and baby carrots.

They were there for me while I packed a home of 7 years into a 100 or more boxes.Not knowing how to go about it or plan friends to strategically help at certain points, they just arrived and packed at the perfect right times. I couldn't have planned it any better. One came for a short time and cleared my fridge just before it was being moved. Another, came and unpacked 10 boxes at super time record. Another came and literally packed my entire kitchen as I went cold turkey at the amount of stuff I had.People just dropped in and did what they could, which all summed up to a wonderfully God orchestrated move. I didn't cook for 2 weeks before the move. Friends showered me with food. They took my kids to play with theirs, so I could pack and clean.

I recognize what Shauna writes as I have it too!

I see my home filled with friends communing at the table.
I see my home and the spare rooms as an opportunity for God to fulfill His plans for us.
I see my home as a desire granted by Him who sees my heart. And I am ever so grateful.

View

Swinging over from Lisa Jo Baker weekly five minute Friday.

Go

Two days ago, I became an aunt. For the first time. So far away from family, I get to see this new nephew of mine through Facebook. Quite a view from here. I tell, the new mother, whatever I can remember about the early days, on holding a new born, on burping , on using Vaseline to smear the bottom so black poop wont stick and hurt the sensitive skin, on the marvelous rush of energy during  the first few days and the pop in that balloon a few days later.

I remember my 'early days' with my boys. And look at them now, on how we have grown through the years. Mothering through trial and error. And they still live, strong and sound, with intact fingers and toes, although a  tooth less before the first year.

I look at them out of the corner of my eye, when they play by themselves, talking to their toys and creating a world of their own. Making sure they don’t see me looking. Occasionally, I get to film this, and watch it a few hundred times watching their mouth, eyes and hands. How a tiny squiggly  looking fetus can be transformed into this complete being, with personalities different and same in ways from their earthly maker. I picture them, growing up to be men of character, compassion, loving their wives and fathering their children. I imagine how their tiny hands, grow out ,into hands of wisdom and care.

I look down from my barely 5 foot view, and see them growing, talking, and thinking. 

I look forward to gazing up from my barely 5 foot view , to the compassion filled, wisdom and knowledge filled, God men we have had the privilege of raising. Walking proudly, with a son on each side protecting their mama. Now, that’s a view I prayerfully look forward to.

STOP