Day 15: Vacations

Going on holidays, long or short is another fun way to add up to the memory bank of fun memories. I have heard of families that plan purposely , holidays at the beginning of the year. That way the families are sure that they are making it priority to spend relaxed fun times with the family and the busyness of a hectic normal routine doesn't jeopardise that . We haven't gone on trips , excluding our India trip after David was born. But that is completely normal when you have just had a baby recently. But when Benjamin, our oldest was born I remember we went camping to a christian conference in the UK when he was just 4 months old. And in his first year we went visiting friends in Edinburg , Scotland , Norway, Brugge in Belgium(when he was a month old). We also made our annual India trip. I don't think we travelled like that with Elijah. I guess we got lazy and blamed it on having two boys .Well, more travel and fun definitely in the process when David is a little bit older.

Here are a few fun way to save a holiday memory;

1. Every time you are on vacation, find a smooth stone or pebble and write a memory from that trip, place and year. Add to the collection of other rocks in a clear jar.
   
   
   
   
   
   
2. Get a wooden box , decorate it with travel signs, family name. Choose the best photo from that trip and put it in the box.
3. Make a phonebook online with all memories from a holiday, or a scrapbook with tickets, keepsake finds from the trip.
4. I think it would be really cool to have one big book for all our adventures. Dedicate one page per trip. Imagine how wonderful it will be to have a collection of all the wonderful adventures in one book. I think this is completely doable and takes the pressure off scrapbooking madness and other time consuming ideas.
5. We also mark on our large sized map in our play room with a red dot of all the places we have visited. Having Europe as our backyard makes it fun especially when Germany, Belgium are just 1 hour away from Eindhoven , The Netherlands.  (I couldn't find my phone to take a picture of our map, so here is a stolen on from the internet, but it just shows the U.S)

DAY 14: Creating memories quotes

DAY 13: Photographs

Take pictures. As often as you can. With technology and having that in the palm of your hand always, gives us great opportunity to capture moments . The iPhone comes out with better camera and lens each time their new versions come out. The quality of those pictures can be compared to pictures taken with a good SLR. With the gadget ready, its the mindset that needs to quick and ready , to capture to precious moments. Take videos of funny moments, moments where they dance, sing, recite the Lords prayer .


A friend of mine has been making photo books for every year. It isn't bulky like the regular old albums and you can add captions and fun doodles around it. Its a bit of work gathering and sorting and adding those pictures to the program. But the end result is so worth it. There are a lot of programs you can use to make photo books. I will be researching a few to start making our yearly books. Will be definitely looking for an easy software , for sure! With my pictures all arranged in iPhotos(Date and year). I am sure it will be an easy job. Hopefully!

A wonderful memory keepsake. We often go through that when we are over at her place and talk about those fun moments and see how the kids have grown, How different we look !

I love capturing moments of the boys together.

DAY 12: Do a Marathon

Both Benjamin and Elijah ran last Sunday in the yearly Marathon in Eindhoven. Benjamin ran the 5K and Elijah even though he trained for 2.5 K , that was taken out of the lot and it was just a 1.5K. They both thoroughly enjoyed it. Bobby ran with Benjamin which started at 10 am and then at 11 am ran with Elijah. I guess, God willing this might be something they might do every year with Bobby. Who knows, maybe they will take up to running. A special time with Bobby! When they were toddlers they also went regularly for the toddler swimming lessons with Bobby. That was their time together. 

Next year I hope they can run for a cause and understand the need.

Benjamin does his first 5K

Proud of my boys

Elijah goofing with the PSV mascot Phoxy

Such a lovely picture of Elijah, smiling and reaching the finish line

DAY 11: The Gift of time

In this day and age, where time is so precious and rare, its so difficult to find TIME. We often wish we had more time. With after school activities, things to do, housekeeping, jobs, new baby, 24 hours isn't enough. I seem to be running all the time. I didn't have 10 minutes these past few days to catch up on my posts. What have I been doing? A lot. How much of it was spending relaxed quality time with the kids? I am ashamed even to give you an answer. I read somewhere, children spell love T-I-M-E.

How can we spend time with them when we don't have time? Slowing down would be a great start for me. Having my to do list for just today and not all the things I want to get done is a good start too.

Here are some ideas:

• Spending one to one time with them is the best thing we can give our kids. Like I mentioned in an earlier post, date nights are great. but this needs a little bit of scheduling and planning.
• Reading aloud with the children for 15 minutes a day.
• Getting them involved in household chores. So, that doesn't mean you tell them what to do and leave them to it while I get something else done. If its emptying the dishwasher, do it together. If its cleaning the playroom, do it together. 
• Sit with your kids while they have breakfast. Maybe you do, and thats fantastic. I usually get the school bags and lunches ready, change and eat my breakfast running around. 
• A family devotion time is a great way to sit and talk with them, discuss the Bible passage you are reading. Hear from them what they think about it. You will be surprised on how much they will ask and talk during this time.
• Go for a short walk. 
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DAY 10: Traditions

As a child , I remember a few family traditions we had. Some were around Christmas, some during the summer holidays. We also fasted a week before the new school year began.

With Christmas around the corner, this is the best time to have meaningful memorable time together with family. That can be remembered for years to come and probably continued by your kids for their family. Family traditions strengthen family bonds, bring them together especially when they are all grown up and busy with their own lives. Its also great to pass on  and remember cultural traditions.

It could be as simple as having something for dinner on a particular day. I know a family who come together (sons and wives and their children) to have their fathers macaroni dinner ever Thursday. A wonderful time to come together and spend time with each other. Benjamin regular mentions that kids in their class have a fries night once a week. Dutch "Frietjes" (fries) are thick and quite tasty. But  once a week is too much for me. I agreed once a month.

For Christmas , I have done Ann Voskamp's "A Jesus Advent Celebration". And also Truth in the tinsel from Oh Amanda.  This year I will use Ann Voskamps Unwrapping the greatest gift.

I also will be starting a grateful for journal with the boys. Have a small notebook and at the end of the day ask them what was the one thing they were thankful / grateful for and write it down. Each family member gets a turn.


What traditions will you be doing with your family ?

DAY 9: A fun present for my boys when they are adults

 I keep a jar near the laundry to collect all the things that come out their pockets, what I find in the washing machine and the dryer. And I am saving it to give it them or show their wives. To royally embarrass them and laugh about it.

A keep sake memory of fun things from the past!

What can you collect and keep to remember the childhood days, to laugh about it, to talk about ?

Some ideas:

1. A shell , or a pebble from every holiday. Write the year and place on it and put it in a jar. 
2. I used to write letters to my dad (we obviously lived together) on how my mum wasn't fair to me , or when she scolded. I saw these letters a few years ago in file in my dads drawer. How cute that he saved it all these years.
3.  A page of favourite things from each year: have a list of favourite things such as favourite colour, tv show, book, food, activity. Let them answer those questions every year. You will how different or same their answers will be over the years. Add it to their school year files. See more here  .

Any other ideas?

DAY 8 : Don't panic about creating memories

Reading these 31 days of  creating memories, can cause stress and the feeling of "are we doing enough for our children" moments.  The intention is not to feel overwhelmed, stressed, not good enough at all. The intention is realise that its important and that it can be done in our own pace, strength and time. Being intentional about it is the key. 

We are great in multi tasking and I am sure like me, you too can fold laundry while doing something with your children.And thats fine when you really need to find clothes for your family to wear and they still lying on the table like a mountain that rises periodically. 

A friend and I were talking about this topic , and how we get so obsessed with other things when our children talk to us. The other Benjamin was telling me about an incident at school and how he reacted well to it and the director complemented him about the way he responded to a difficult situation. All I could think of was that "HE WASNT WEARING ANY SOCKS OR HIS SLIPPERS AT THE MOMENT"(and its autumn). Look at the height of my obsession about these silly small things. I was angry at myself for not giving him my 100% attention to him proudly talking about his actions. 

Well, I learned from my mistake and focussed on him the next time he came with something important. And I didn't even notice the milk dripping from his titled cereal bowl! Am I great or what?

Life is busy as it is and you don't want to hear someone giving you 31 ways to create moments to make  you feel guilty. You do what you can well and intentionally . These children are God's assignment to you and we have just 18 years of their life(even less now these days) to shape them, pour into them and teach them the values God wants them to have.

Day 7: Reading

Reading out aloud to your kids , since they are babies and even when you are carrying them has been proven to help their literacy skills, affinity to reading, higher awareness of sounds and letters.

Other than these scientific and academic reasons , reading a special book (a big chapter book and not only picture books), is another moment to share a special bonding time with the kids. It can be part of the routine before going to bed.

We read to them when they were tiny kids, why not continue that when they are older too . I am sure they will like it , at least until they are 10 or 11 years perhaps. All kids can be different.

They can look forward to hearing what happens next the following day. Ask questions, discuss about the events, explain new words to them and even let them share in the reading from a few lines to a paragraph. Its not a time to test their reading ability but a lovely time to snuggle with them and read for just the love of reading, hearing stories.

Choose a book with them and begin reading to them as much as you can..... These precious years of pouring into them, strengthening your bond with each child will fly away soon.

Day 6: Family Devotion

In an age where families are  busy with  hectic schedules, after school activities, church events, birthday parties, sports, having a family devotion ends up last on the priority list. Church going, Sunday school are equally important but families need to build their relationship with God together as  a family.

Adding to the Christian journey , of each family member , is praying together on a daily basis. A family devotion is a great way to share, encourage, teach, discuss and answer questions. Its a place where both adults and children can be part of the family's prayers. Being equally involved and responsible to uphold each other. A place for children to learn how to pray for others, to hear us as parents pray and to learn God's Word.  While praying , its also important to model the Lords prayer, showing them that our communication with God starts with praising Him and glorifying Him, thanking Him, telling Him our needs,

With the recommendation of a friend, we have started this devotion a couple of months back. While the children were young we used toddler devotions such as "Toddler Devotions".

"Long Story Short". This is a 10 minute family devotion from the Old Testament (There is another one for the New Testament). Its 5 days of devotions connecting to Jesus on one of the days. Pointing out to God's salvation for us.
This worked really well for that age. Now that they are 5 and 8 , we use

Some lines picked out from the description on Amazon :

"Long Story Short will help busy parents share with their children how every story in the Old Testament points forward to God's story of salvation through Jesus Christ. "

"Long Story Short is a family devotional program designed to explain God's plan of salvation through the Old Testament and is suitable for children from preschool through high school."



The family that prays together, stays together........

Day 5: Memories from everyday moments for later

Memories need to be captured. Not just because its a trend but a reminder of the wonderful way God has protected our children, the way God gave us the grace and wisdom at some of those moments. Its a way to give thanks to God and remain grateful.

Since the boys were born, I have recorded their milestones, achievements, when they were sick, that sort of thing. Of course the frequency has reduced now and not every sneeze and cough is recorded, But I try to jot down things that needs to remembered. New activity, a lost tooth, such things. I write them in a way that I am talking to them. The book will be passed on to them later on.

Some other ways that I keep these memories ;

1. I have  a book of all the funny things they have said. Its hilarious to go back and look through them. 
2.  A file with each of their school year and a few worth keeping pictures, first writings, report cards and school pictures. Read here for a post on that.
3. I bought two copies of Dr. Seuss "Oh the places you'll go", and I get their teachers from every year to write on a page. A memory from each of their teachers. 
4. I take a photo of all their art work and have it on an app called Artkive. this app also makes all the art work into a nice book. A perfect way to store all the art work without the bulk and storage issues. 

What about you? Do you have a special way to save these memories? I would love to hear them. Please do share in the comment box.

Day 4: The words we use

The boys somehow, mostly remember the not so nice things that I say. And manage to forget all the other wonderful, meaningful, praise , kind and sensitive things I say. Words matter and its stick real close to their heart.  I don't want them to grow up and say "Mum hardly said anything nice to us, Oh she was so negative all the time". "And what about all that instructions and orders she barked at us all the time?"

What can I do to overcome that and make sure they have good memories of the things we say as parents?

How do I become a parent who  uses words of encouragement, words of praise and wisdom. Words of kindness and love?

Though we have to be careful of going over the top with praising them. Strike a balance in complementing them in things they do. I heard somewhere that if we wear three rubber bands on one hand, we needs to have all three of them moved to the other hand by the end of the day. We move each one of them, when we have complemented them, or praised them for something they have done. Three good things. Now , we can say three things. That easy. Ya, right! You'd think so. I tried it and it was hard the first few days.

Praise is sort of a feedback for kids. We want to build their confidence and give them positive meaningful praise for the things they do.

I have to choose the incidents or those things to let go for the greater good. Avoiding to nitpick at every little thing. Imagine hearing ourselves, if all that we say throughout the day was recorded. Shasta a great place to start in realising the way we use words, not only with our children, but spouses and others around.

Day 3: Date Nights

Before David was born we started doing date nights. Well, we did it only a few times. But the intention was to do it once every month for each child, each parent. In the busyness of life , its so hard to get one -one- time with the boys.

We went for a local festival last Sunday and took a silly picture

Benjamin and I once went to the book store, and sat at the coffee shop and talked. I asked him how he felt when I was in the hospital with David. And he opened up. And shared his feelings exactly. We talked about it. Later, we went and bought one of his favourite book series. I did the same with Elijah another time. And asked him the same question. He said "I don't know ". Mind you , he was only 4 years old. We left it at that and continued our evening. I am going to pick it up from this month.

It is such a precious time to have with each child. They look forward to it and becomes a tradition. They know its special time with Mama. You don't have to buy them something every time or spend money on it.

Here are some ideas: (Would you add to it in the comment box?)

1. To the movies
2. Pancake house(Common here in the Netherlands) Or go to an ice cream place 
3. Going out for walks, discovering a new part of the neighbourhood/parks/interesting buildings
4. Board game night
5. Bake with them
6. Go out for lunch/dinner
7. Go shopping
8. Geocaching (which I would love to explore and start)
9. Go to a book store
10. Get a manicure done together (for girls)
11. Make something creative
12. Go out to the local zoo , or petting zoo.
13. Volunteer at a soup kitchen (I would like to find an alternative to something here in the Netherlands)
14. Do a photoshoot with you and that child
15. Slouch on the couch and play on the Ipad/Videogames and have one of those "sometimes junk food". (Go ahead, I give you permission. I am sure boys will definitely love this)

Day 2: Doing what we can with what we have

Already on Day 2, and I missed writing. Can I blame it on a Friday? And two cakes to make for the weekend? And kids? Well, grace in all things , I believe. Todays to do is to find a way to organise the 31 days write for efficiency.

Elijah didn't have school on Friday(The kinder-garters don't have school every other Friday). This was a great opportunity to spend some alone time with him. Other than dragging him to 3 cake stores to buy my cake supplies(One shop was closed, the other had no stock of most things having a delayed delivery that week, and finally all the way in the centre , I found what I needed), we did have a good day.

Most of my days goes in feeding David. He doesn't drink with a cup or bottle. And he feed by spoon. Thankfully , I have a bottle spoon gadget. I just need to squeeze from the bottle on to the spoon and feed. But that still takes time. And I have to learn to spend and do things with the other two while I feed David. This is the phase I am going through and I have to make the best out of it.

So, while I fed David, I played math games with him on the I pad. We listened to Bible stories and their activities per story. Discussed about it and spend an hour, Elijah on the floor and me on the couch. He really thrives of "talking". I answered his ever so many questions, said funny things to which we laughed hilariously.

That's the only time I got with him the whole day, amidst activities and me going our for my birthday dinner with the ladies. But that was a great 1 hour.

We have to do with what we have and make the best out of it. In the past I would fret over the times I couldn't do special things with the boys. I have all the time I need while I feed David to think about many things. With two hands occupied , I can't do anything but think and pray. Keeps me focussed because I can't do anything else. For this multi- takers thats difficult. So I do, what I must do and can do best. Pray for them.

Nothing better than focussed prayer for your children.
Doing what we can, with what we have to be intentional with them. Nothing adventurous but sweet and simple.

Day 1: Write 31 Days topic reveal

I did my first "Write 31 days" in 2012. It was new and exciting and it was hard to make sure I wrote every day. In 2014, I started but couldn't finish as David was born 2 weeks early.  Here we are in 2015 and I am looking forward to sharing, learning and improving my writing.

I began thinking of this years "31 days to..." early September. Very soon I knew what it would be. With 3 boys and a busy week I knew this was it.

31 days to creating memories with your children.

Spending a lot of time with a baby, I realised that I hardly had anytime to spend  with the older two. I fed and bathe them and did the bare minimum. And of course scream and nag and annoyed them. But time was going by and I was losing building memories with them. I knew that I didn't have to do spectacular things with them to create memories. It was in those small everyday moments. And even that needs to be planned and intentional.

The memories I have as a child are those of times spend together as a family. During the summer , if we didn't go to India, we would learn a Bible verse, and a word everyday. At the end of the summer we would have to say all the verses we could and say the meaning of random words. The one with the most number of correct verses gets special prize. Another memory, was the times when we would sit at the kitchen floor and have lunch after we came back from school. These are just few of the many memories.

I want to build simple memories like this with my children. So when they grow up they will fondly remember the special things we did as a family.

This is for me and hopefully for you . Especially during a time when life is busy and hectic ,I want to intentionally choose my children over the hectic lifestyle. The ideas need to be realistic and practical so that it can be done and it will have  a lasting impact on me and my family .

Here's to 31 days to creating memories with your children .

Day 1: Write 31 days topic reveal
Day 2:  Doing what we can with what we have
Day 3: Date Night
Day 4: The words we use
Day 5: Memories from everyday moments for later
Day 6: Family Devotion
Day 7: Reading
Day 8:Dont panic about creating memories
Day 9: A fun present for my boys when they are adults
Day 10:  Traditions
Day  11: Gift of time
Day 12: Do a marthon
Day 13: Photographs
Day 14:Creating Memories Quotes
Day 15: Vacations
Day 16: More photos
Day 17:
Day 18:
Day 19:
Day 20:
Day 21:
Day 22:
Day 23:
Day 24:
Day 25:
Day 26:
Day 27:
Day 28:
Day 29:
Day 30:
Day 31:

To the movies with 7

Last week I braved on to take 2 five year olds, 3 eight year olds, and 2 nine years to see the movie Inside Out. By bus. It was fun and the kids weren't too much to handle. They were a decent bunch.

Inside Out was a lovely movie and I even shed a few tears towards the end. It strangely spoke to me so much. With a bunch of emotions , Joy, Sadness, Anger, Disgust and Fear guiding the life of this girl, it was important to see we need all of these. Even sadness , anger, fear and disgust.Not only joy. Now Joy always tried to keep sadness away from the controls, as Joy wanted to keep the girl also happy and cheerful. But sadness puts her hand here and there and disrupts the rhythm that joy were careful manages. Long story short Joy realises that you need sadness to come in order to ask for help and be with the people you love and care most.

We often try to let joy stand out on our faces and keep sadnesses inside , letting none see that. But God does and He wants us to come to Him and have His comforting arms around us, His healing touch on us....

Well, that was my penny worth from Inside Out....